A Valentine’s Day Blog: Not Just for Lovers

With the official day of love approaching, I wanted to remind you that Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be just for lovers. Make the people in your life…your kids, cousins, grandma, aunt, dad, even you….know they are special too. Here are just a few ways to show love to everyone you love: Call them instead of text and let them know you just wanted to hear their voice. Send someone a handwritten thank you card for something they did for you OR for how important they are in your life. Give someone a nice tight hug…don’t be the first the let go…this actually goes for all hugs. For the kids: you can either make them a card, old school style or buy them one…write the little loves of your life a love letter. Don’t forget the small box of sweets. For you… (ain’t nothing wrong with some self loving) write yourself a love letter.  Start an “I love you because…” Journal to yourself and everyday write the reasons you love yourself. Treat yourself to a beautiful dinner. Go for a walk by yourself. Send yourself the flowers and/or candy you want and be just as happy as if someone else bought them for you. Whatever you decide to do, make someone feel special everyday…”One is loved because one is loved.  No reason is needed for loving.” ~Paulo Coelho...

A Motherless Mother’s Letter to Self on Depression

Written by Paula Jones Dear Old Self, People tell you all the time to take care of yourself, do what makes you happy, don’t depend on anybody to give you joy, and you have to learn to let people go and live their lives. I wake up every morning with the intent to be happy. But when you struggle with “depression” there are some triggers that can decrease your mood within seconds. It has nothing to do with people stealing your joy and you depending on them to make you happy. It’s an illness that is medically explained, that people don’t take the time to research. They tell you, do other things to distract your mood. Don’t you think, if I could, I would? One trigger, is the death of my mother. I grew privileged but learned everything about life from peers and the streets. My mama was raised a certain way that she gave me the love she received from her childhood.  There wasn’t much affection or attention but a lot of fussing, ridicule and tough love. It was hard some days wishing I had my mother to hug me, kiss me, and say, I love you because she didn’t do those things, she expected me to know. Now that she’s resting in heaven, I wish she was here to give me that tough love. My lifeline is void & I miss her. My heart grieves for my daddy whose home is lonely. I can’t imagine his grief. I have my husband & kids but what’s special to me was becoming a grandmother. It gives me joy having...

Jealousy

I’ve been fighting with myself on whether or not I wanted to write about this.  In my journey to help others I’ve come to the conclusion that I have to be open about my life, my emotions, and how I work through it all. So…I caught myself feeling jealous.  Mario (my significant other) and I were both on the verge of catching colds.  He called me at work and asked me to pick up Christian (our oldest son) because he was feeling ill.  I told him I was about to text him and ask if I could come home and get in the bed and he deal with the kids because I was feeling like crap. As I walk in the house with the boys and begin to give them a snack, Mario’s on the phone with his mother asking her to come over to take care of the boys because we’re both not feeling well.  His mother agrees and will be over in 15 minutes.  A part of me is happy he asked because I really didn’t feel like dealing with the boys but there’s another part of me that feels like I should be sicker than I am if he has to ask his mother to come take care of us. At that moment I know she’s on her way so I go upstairs put on my pj’s and begin to “look sick”. Mario’s obviously sicker than I am because by the time his mother gets to the house he’s too weak to open the door.  So I go downstairs to open the door and his mother asks “where’s...